In Which I Respond to Isilie and Reaffirm Myself as a H!P Fan

June 29, 2011

I don’t read a lot of blogs. I am a bad member of this fan community that way. But one blog that I always read and always love is Itsumo Genki. If you haven’t already, you should go read Isilie’s latest post there, in which she ponders the stagnation of H!P (its de-evolution, in her own words). The post affected me strongly, and after I read it, I began typing out a response. Well, that response ended up being… VERY long. Rather than take up all of Isilie’s comment space, I’ve fiddled with  my response a bit, and am now posting it here. I’ve tried to make this reply understandable even if you haven’t read Isilie’s post… but seriously, why wouldn’t you want to? Go read it! (And then come back.)

Isilie’s post made me very sad, for a lot of reason: because it put to words some of the worries I’ve been mulling over lately; because I don’t think I could have said it quite as gently and clearly as she did; and because I value Isilie’s opinions as a fellow blogger, so it makes me sad to see her at something of a low point in her fandom.

That said, my opinions on most of the points she made don’t match up with hers.

The first point that I take umbrage with is the idea that H!P groups ought to stop performing certain songs. To quote Isilie, “Some songs should just retire, not because they aren’t amazing, classic songs, but because H!P just isn’t the same place anymore.” I must disagree.

a

b

I look forward to the times when H!P covers itself. Because I love all of the girls so much (with a few REINA exceptions), it’s a pleasure to see them succeed, fail, or even just meet expectations when performing another artist’s songs. It shows another facet of them, aside from their personally sculpted idol persona. Some song choices play into that persona, of course: Momoko singing Momoiro Kataomoi, Gaki singing Boogie Train, etc. But as Isilie mentioned, other choices are surprising. Maasa singing The Bigaku? Who would have expected that? But it gave us a chance to see her perform with a kind of sparkle and energy that is such a deviation from her usually my-pace character. Shin Mini Moni, the youngest bunch of performers in H!P, performing a sultry T&C Bomber number? I loved it. I would never have known that Karin could bend her voice in such amazing ways had I not seen that performance.

That said, I agree that there are times when covers flop. When the first BK vs. C-ute concert was announced, I envisioned a section in which the groups would cover each other. I wanted to see how the girls could transform, if the crazy girls of Berryz could badass it up in Tokaikko Junjou, and if C-ute could let it go and be crazy and fun with something like Piriri to Yukou. When no such thing happened on a major scale, I was sad. Disappointed. I felt like an opportunity had been wasted.

But now I think that might’ve been a mistake. Imagine today’s BK singing and dancing to Kiss Me Aishiteru. They’re a versatile group, but their recent experiment with sexy has made it clear that their strength lies in their fun, out-there ability to sing about monkeys with conviction. And C-ute. They’re great at the kind of cool, strong dance tunes that they’ve been putting out. Momoiro Sparkling was cute, but seemed so tame and dull when compared to the fierceness that we’ve grown used to C-ute hurling at us. Experimentation is great, but some groups have a niche, and H!P seems most comfortable letting them stay within that niche.

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Compare this…

But when the groups go outside of that niche, and fail… isn’t that all part of their growth as artists? Even the most ear-rending performances are valuable in that way. Take Risako. A few years ago, 12-year old Rii performed Matsuura Aya’s famous ballad, Hajimete Kuchibiru wo Kasaneta Yoru. She sounded awful. Terrible. She looked confused, and nervous, and, frankly, like a 12-year old child singing a song far outside of her comprehension. Five years later, she again performed the song, and look at her progress. She made that song into something that she could tackle. Maybe her singing still isn’t Aya-level, but that’s not her strength as an Idol. We as fans would never have been able to truly appreciate Risako’s handling of the song in this latest concert if we had not seen her fail at it so miserably when she was young.

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…to this.

And then, Isilie takes on the factor that fans try and fail to scrutinize- The Tsunku factor. Why, we wonder, has his music lost its popularity? Why continue to give Aya boring ballads when her upbeat songs sold so well? How the heck is he picking his auditionees? And just how much control does he have?

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The simple explanation is to recognize the fact that the T-man is insane… locked-in-a-padded-room-muttering-and-chewing-toothpicks insane. But there’s got to be more to it than that. There has to be SOME thought process behind what Tsunku does. He is supposed to be a businessman, a producer, a mentor figure. He has to make choices that, at the very least, make money.So, why do his decisions so often seem mind-bogglingly stupid?

At least on the outside, he has all of the power in H!P. But more and more often lately we as fans have been questioning his control. We know that he does choose line-distribution. Sayumi (who seems to provide the most insight into the inner workings of H!P lately) has made that clear. And yet, if he does, then some of his other actions just do not add up. If he chooses line distribution, then why not give lines to the two members who were supposed to help H!P expand into the rest of Asia? Tsunku allegedly has the power to have give Jun and Lin lines in H!P songs- and for some reason, chose not to. From a purely business standpoint, that was not a good choice. No girl can magically become a top-earner without any sort of push. And yet it seems as though that was what he required of them.

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God, it was fun finding pictures for this part…

Why? We just don’t know his motives. Pressure from higher ups? Maybe. Racism? Doesn’t seem so- he had Jun and Lin over for noodles rather often (according to his hilarious blog). Crack? A popular theory, but not likely.

Now we see the same kind of silly business being repeated with the 9th generation. Tsunku has his clear favorite in Riho, but how can he expect the others to become anything in the public eye if he doesn’t give them a chance to sing? Of course singing doesn’t count for everything, but a quick solo line or two might be enough to catch the ear of a new fan. Tsunku has to know that- he isn’t dumb. But if he does know that, he doesn’t seem to care.

All of that would make Tsunku seem predictable, and frustratingly so. Of course Reina and Ai will have 75% of the solos in the next single. Of course he’s going to pick one boring, seemingly talentless girl at his next audition. And yes, that would render him dully predictable… if he weren’t so damn crazy at the same time. We see his craziness all of the time- having C-ute put out passionate love songs one minute and cutesy summer songs the next, occasionally throwing the less popular members of the groups a memorable solo line, and especially in whom he chooses to be H!P’s next generation. Who could have expected that Riho would be so creepily talented, Zukki would be so entertaining, Ikuta so easy to root for, and Mizuki so lovely? If you give him credit, Tsunku could have, and did.

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Seriously, LOOK at her! SO cute.

I’ve stopped stressing about Tsunku’s motives. I’ve come to accept them as part of what’s so fun about H!P. He is part of the unpredictable craziness that we love most about Hello! Project. We never know when he’ll graduate someone, what the next song will be like, or who his next favorite will be. We don’t know if he’s just a character, or a scapegoat, or a god-figure looming over all of the project. Sure, we can formulate a pretty good guess based on his seemingly predictable past actions, but there have been so many unexpected moments that it would be silly to write the T-man off as a one-trick pony.

My love for H!P is stronger than ever. Do the low sales lately get me down? Absolutely. Do I think that H!P is in a strange limbo, both trying to move forward in the face of competition and trying to relive its glory days? Yes indeed. Is it stagnating, as Isilie posits? Perhaps. But none of that is going to stop me from loving every single moment of it. Even when I’m sobbing my eyes out over a performance of Ame no Furanai, I’m enjoying myself. I’m glad that I’m a H!P fan, and that means that I’ll take the bad with the good.

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Where else would I find images that make me burst into tears and laugh happily at the same time?

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Where I stand on: AKB48

October 3, 2010

Alternative Title:  The Opinions of the Under-informed.

Because I am chiefly a H!P fan, this blog is very Hello! Project-centric, but at its inception, I intended it to have a broader subject matter. I don’t mind mostly talking about H!P, of course, but in the next few posts, I’d like to take the time to cover a few things that I rarely take the time to mention in this blog, a sort of  “This is Aoi♥Usagi’s Official Stance on ______.” I will try to go beyond mere opinion and provide a bit of analysis, because I don’t like my posts to be too self-indulgent. 😉

To kick this series off, I’ll start with one of the things that I do mention from time to time: AKB48.

The Quick Facts:

Favorite Member: Miyzawa Sae

Favorite Song: Namida Uri no Shoujo

Favorite Single: Oogoe Diamond, Sakura Shiori

Favorite Subunit: I still love Chocolove!

Least Favorite Member: None

First off: I don’t consider myself a fan of AKB48. In my mind, a fan is someone who goes above and beyond casual interest in a group.  I have about 30 AKB48 songs on my Ipod, watch their new PVs, can name a few members, and keep up with new happenings in their world. But I can’t name all of the girls, don’t actively search out information on them, and haven’t sat down and watched a full stage since K4. So while I certainly don’t dislike AKB48, I’m far from being a fan.

As a fan of Hello! Project, I feel as though my thoughts and wants, and those of the general H!P community, are represented and understood by those in power. Tsunku has said many times that he reads online forums. If a feeling is expressed strongly enough in the H!P fan community, we do see our desires granted. Case in point, the decision to scrap Koi wa Hassou as the 28th single in favor of Chokkan 2. The fan reaction to Koi as Hassou was less than enthusiastic, and we were heard. Although it’s not confirmed, a similar thing may have happened with MM’s upcoming 44th single, as well.

The relationship between H!P fans and the higher ups in H!P feels established. We may not get everything we want, but our whims are generally respected. There is mutual dependence, and the relationship thus feels comfortable and solid.

(He may be the most ridiculous man alive, but at least he respects us)

The feeling I get from AKB48 is entirely different. Despite the fact that AKB fans are given a much more direct chance to affect the future of their Idols (through Senbatsu), the transient nature of that chance doesn’t give the same feeling of safety and stability as does the power relationship within H!P. With every new single or election, fans risk having their established opinions ignored. The most recent example of that is, of course, the Yuko/Acchan struggle. Fans made it pretty clear that Yuko was the girl they wanted to see as AKB’s Number 1 (she had about 600 more votes than Acchan in the Heavy Rotation senbatsu). But when the next single came around, that desire was ignored, and Atsuko was right back in the center.

This relationship is further complicated by the desires of casual fans.  Now, H!P obviously doesn’t have as many casual fans as AKB48 does. If they did, H!P’s sales wouldn’t be so dismal. But despite that, the lack of many  casual H!P fans means that the wota, those who have dedicated their love to their Idols, have a greater say in the girls’ futures. As far as AKB48, those who are really devoted to their Idols seem to be drowned out by the money-paying masses. So a H!P fan can sit back on his or her laurels, knowing that what they want will be heard, whereas an AKB fan has to worry and worry about whether or not their voice matters.

However, there is one huge positive for AKB48: Change.

I’ll say it: H!P is been fairly stagnant musically and in terms of members.  That has a huge effect on the sales of merchandise. I’m not saying that this stagnation is the sole reason that H!P’s sales aren’t what the once were, but I do think that it’s a major factor. Dedicated fans tend to dislike change. They don’t want to see their Number 1 fall from favor or, Gaki forbid, graduate. That desire is respected, and the fans feel safe. But nothing changes, and the casual public becomes bored.

The lack of safety in AKB48 means that no such stagnation is permitted, or indeed possible. The public won’t tire of AKB48 as long as those in charge of the group keep changing things up, and turning the desires of the casual fans into shocking new ideas (see my last post).

Lastly, what of the supposition that, as a H!P fan, I must automatically be an AKBhater?

Well, that’s just silly, isn’t it? 🙂


…Guardians… 4…?

March 28, 2009

A new H!P group for Shugo Chara, H!P’s anime BFF, has been announced! It’s called Guardians 4 and consists of Kumai Yurina, Sugaya Risako, Nakajima Saki and Mitsui Aika.

So my initial reaction to the new group was this:

“Is that a g-word I spy? G as in… GRADUATION?! OHMIGOD. KUMAI’S GRADUATING?!”

After more careful perusal, I figured out that the word was indeed “guardian,” and not “graduation.”

Although I love the idea of a new grouping of H!P girls, I’m none too pleased with this one. All I can say is that as of now, even Yurina cannot save this painful grouping of girls. None of them can sing a jot aside from Yurina, who’s hit-and-miss. I HATE Mittsi’s ugly hair-cut, and Risako cannot dance. What was the inspiration behind this group?! Perhaps it’s a similarity to the characters?

In Shugo Chara, the main character (Amu) is part of what is essentially a souped-up school-council called the School Guardians. The girls in Guardians 4 are wearing the School Guardians’ outfits. Let’s compare the girls to some of the anime/manga’s School Guardians, shall we?

Kumai Yurina:

Comparable School Guardian: Nadeshiko/Nagihiko.

Nadeshiko is the gentle, feminine and reserved best friend of the main character. She has long, black hair and is somewhat tall. She is also a boy. There’s a little side story about how it’s tradition for the boys in his family to be raised as girls until they reach a certain age, to supposedly learn how to play female roles in traditional Japanese dance. Nagihiko is his name as a boy.

Yurina actually fits this character well. Yurina has a very refined, gentle and ladylike aura to her, just like Nadeshiko/Nagihiko. She’s a very traditional Japanese beauty… And if she’s actually a cross-dresser, more power to her.

Nakajima Saki:

Comparable School Guardian: Yaya Yuiko or Nadeshiko/Nagihiko as well.

Yaya is the youngest Guardian. She’s determined to act like a baby (in order to get her parents’ attention back from her baby brother). She is hyper and likes cute things. I say that Saki fits this image because she is sort of tiny and scrappy and cutesy like that.

The only reason that I say that Nadeshiko might suit Nakki is the way that her hair is in the preview images- She’s got it tied back in a bow, which was Nadeshiko’s signature look.

Sugaya Risako

Comparable School Guardian: Mashiro Rima

Rima is the gorgeous but stuck-up and aloof new girl at the school, who eventually joins the Guardians when Nadeshiko leaves to go… er, go away and then return as Nagihiko.

She fits my idea of Sugaya perfectly. Risako exudes this over-confident, aloof aura- she knows people love her, and she thinks that she’s totally deserving of that love no matter what. Many also find her to be indescribably gorgeous. Similarly, Rima stands aloof and doesn’t even try to make friends when she joins the Guardians- she insists that all she needs are her love-struck male “slaves,” the boys in the class who, having a crush on her, will do anything for her. Kinda like wota.

Mitsui Aika:

Comparable School Guardian: Soma Kukai

Kukai is the sporty, jocky, gung-ho character that’s friends with everyone and totally in your face. He’s loud and bright and cheerful, which to me totally fits with the slightly more mischievous, genki side of Mittsi. However, Kukai leaves the Guardian’s early on. What does this say about Mittsi’s prescence within the group?

SO, IN ALL?

Striking as they may be, as far as I’m concerned, these similarities are no excuse for such a tossed-together group. Weren’t Mittsi and Saki together already in that Robby & Kerobby or whatever group? I dunno. This grouping just seems so random. Well, we’ll see. I just hope that they aren’t going to be replacing Buono!


RR2!

March 7, 2009

The second installment of my Rankingu Revolution shall deal with the Berryz- my first and still favorite group of singing-dancing J-pop hamsters!

Last year’s thoughts

#7. Sugaya Risako

Former position: #7

Oooooooooooh C-ko, how I dislike thee! For all the standard reasons, of course; her hotter-than-thou persona, her refusal to sing like a civilized person, and her evident lack of effort when it comes to dancing.

Now, two of those three flaws also could apply to a certain Ishimura Maiha, adorable woodchuck Berry of my dreams (seriously, I love that girl), so what’s the difference, one wonders? Well, look at the difference in line distribution betwixt the two. See it? Good. Now go listen to Yume de Do Wop (Do up? Doo Wop? Uh… Nanchuu Koi wo Yatteru You Know’s b-side) and think about the Woodhchuck Berry, and sigh.

#6. Natsuyaki Miyabi

Former position (one wonders why I don’t say “former rank,” as this is a ranking…): #4

So at this point, rank doesn’t really matter any more. I love every single one of the non-Risako Berryz nearly equally. Where they rank just depends on how I’m feeling that day, or how they performed at the latest live.

So Miyabi gets ranked here, but there’s really very little change in how I feel about her from last year. She’s only getting more and more gorgeous, although lately I feel like she’s expressionless during live performances. I love her new haircut.

chinamilegs#5. Tokunaga Chinami

Former Position: #3

I could say that China and Momo are tied for their position, but that would be boring, wouldn’t it? I basically think that Chinami’s the hottest thing that’s ever walked around on two legs. Especially her two legs… She’s also nearly as funny as Momoko.

#4. Tsugunaga Momoko

Former Position: #5

I NAMED MY IPOD AFTER THIS MONKEYGIRL.

She’s entertaining and has the best singing ability (but not the best voice, that would be Miya) out of all of the Berryz. I absolutely adore her.

Also. What is with the Berryz looking like animals? Momoko is a strange monkeygirl, Miyabi is Seabiscuit, and Maiha was obviously descended from a long lineage of woodchucks. Kumai even has the word “bear” in her name! Hmm…

Idols genetically made to contain animal DNA…

It’s like a cross between Kirarin Revolution and Tokyo Mew Mew. OH GOD. THE SHOUJO. IT BURNS.

009#3. Kumai Yurina

Former Position: #2

After all this time, I still love Yurina. If I had to pick one Berryz member to meet, it would be Saki, and I’d fangirl all over her. But if I had to pick one Berryz member to call up when I was sad, it would be Yurina. Just looking at pictures of her calms me down, and watching her perform always has me sitting there with this stupid happy smile on my face. She exudes a sweet gentleness that always makes me glad to be around.

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maasama#2. Sudou Maasa

Former Position: #1

Before I say anything; Maasa is getting her first photobook! Can I get a Hellz Yeah?! Whoever at UFA made that decision has my eternal love and respect. Then again, that same person might have had the idea to give Rii three (or was it four now?) photobooks before O CAPTAIN MY CAPTAIN ever even got one, so… I revoke my respect.

I never download PBs- I’ve only done so on two occasions (That would be Kamei’s Maple and Yurina’s… whatever it’s called. Probably “Yurina” or something. First photobooks in H!P get the lamest titles), but I’m definitely going to find some way to download this one.

Maasa and Captain occasionally change places for first or second, depending on how I’m feeling that day. Maasa makes me laugh. I look at her, and I laugh. I can just feel that funny things are just around the corner. Maa has a strong personality, which is good when compared with such gentle creatures as as Kumai or Miyabi. She stands out. Plus she’s the only Berry who I think might be able to defend herself in a self-defense situation. Being the martial artist that I am, things like that matter to me.

captain-photo-by-chinami#1. ShimiSaki- O Kyaputen, my Kyaputen!

Former Position: #6

ShimiSaki can be so cool at times that I get as giddy as a middle schooler at a HSM concert. It’s like Return of the Yoshizawa Only Shorter and As Of Yet Not Blond. So on days when I want to fangirl my brains out, I look up Captain. She just has this amazing ability to draw one into the performance and keep you there, just like Yossy was always able to do.

The reason she’s come up so far in my Wota ranking is almost entirely the BK vs. C-ute concert. She did amazing things there.

All in all? I love the Berryz. It’s been five years since they came into the J-poposphere, and while they haven’t really made Musume-levlr strides om said microcosm, for this one fangirl, that doesn’t matter.

PS:

COMEBACKWOODCHUCK!


FOREVER LOVE… y’mean Tokkaiko 2, right?

November 17, 2008

C-ute’s new PV is not spectacular, but it’s still pretty damn good. I’m loving that they sprung some surprise outfits on us for the dance shot. I’m also loving that no one even bothered to hide the fact that Berryz got the crappier computers for their PV. It speaks volumes about the current placement of these two groups within H!P’s priority list. Berryz has basically become a joke, sort of like Melon Kinenbi did when they released their infamous PV for Onegai Miwaku no Target. I mean, look at this:

bettercompy

Chisato: Ha ha ha! OMG, the girl in that picture’s totally got octopus hair! Lol, what a lame-o!

Kanna: … Wonder if I should tell Chisato that that’s one of her official UFA pics from this PV? They basically photoshop her into unrecognizeability anyways. so it shouldn’t matter, but…

Erika: Mai, how many times must I tell you? Stop trying to unhook my bra in public. Just wait till later, okay?

Mai: C’mon, baby. No one’s watching! Just for a few minutes!

Airi: And that, my friends, is how you download free porn.

Maimi: Wooooow! Airi, who knew you had such hidden talents?

Saki: Hey, that girl in this hentai kinda looks like Yaguchi Mari! Only her name’s Yauchi. What’s this called again? Shining Musume? Funny, that almost sounds like… Oh.

I’m pleased, in general, with how the girls look. The menswear theme is really cool, and I’m loving the boots. With the alternate outfits, each of the girls gets a somewhat menswear inspired feminine outfit, expect for Airi, who’s wearing a particularly attractive little capelet which is nevertheless the aboslute worst thing to be wearing when dancing. It kills her movements. I think I’m the most in love with Mai’s clothes. The remind me of Kanashimi Twilight.

kanna-and-chisatush

The worst outfit award HAS to go to Kanna. She has this odd overall outfit in a really heinous plaid. It totally doesn’t fit around her hips, and it makes her torso look way too short. The hat and the scarf just make it that much worse. She ends up looking like she’s gotten confused as to whether she’s being Orphan Annie or one of the factory boys from Oliver.

However, something else stood out to me about this screen-shot, something far more interesting than the fact that whoever chose Kanna’s clothes was obviously high:

chisatushOMG, ChisaTUSH for the win!

maimifacetouch

Like this move? Takahashi taught it to me. It’s really original and makes me look distraught and hurt, lol!

Maimi was, as usual, looking stunning. For me, Maimi herself isn’t physically my type. She’s pretty, but not in a way that I really care about. But something about the way she carries herself really appeals to me. Maybe it’s because that she’s actually a UFA built cyborg that she carries herself like that, the original having been absorbed by the ManoCreature ages ago.

airibitch

On your knees. Lick my boots. Curl my hair. Kill Momoko and Miyabi so I can go solo.

Somehow… Airi… really made me happy in this one.

Maybe it’s because she knows how to download internet porn. -shrugs- You decide.

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No matter how you look at it, Chisato is gorgeous in this PV. But her hair… her hair…

How much hair cement did it take to make it look like someone had basically stuck an octopus to her scalp and called it a day? Whoever thought of this style should be shot (although I don’t mind the bangs).

nakkiewfl

Nakki, oh, Nakki. What happened here? You look like some Mexican guy, and not the sexy kind that have big muscles and looks good when they’re sweating. The scrawny kind with the thin little mustache that tries to sell you things on the side of the street and is wearinga stained tank top and has too much hair gel in their hair.

But, uh, you looked great dancing. In fact, that purple blazer of yours in the alternate outfit version was fantastic. I tried the exact same thing on today while shopping at Banana Republic.

It looked better on you.

Dammit.

kannafl

Kanna, oh, Kanna…

Whatever Saki did wrong, you did right. You’re breathtaking in this PV, in that special lesbian way that only you can be.

maimai

Mai looks like a sickly child here. Like the kind you see carrying an inhaler in their fanny pack, along with their hanky and handi-wipes, just in case.

Er, yeah, Mai. Better luck next time.

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If any of you needed proof that Erika is part woodchuck…

Erika was mostly just Erika here. Kinda out of place, but still sexy. I abslolutely loved her curly hair during some parts of the dance shot. She looks so much better that way.

(Oh, the reason for the title of this was because the song, the PV, the dance, the line distribution, all of it basically makes me thing of Tokaikko Junjou/ That’s not bad. I love that song and PV.)

I give this PV a 8 out of 10, and the song an 8.5 out of 10, because I’m just that great.

Now if you’ll excuse, I’m going to go stare at ChisaTUSH some more.


♠♦♥♣

September 21, 2008

So! Thanks to Mars (The blogger of Stardust. Wait a minute. Wow. That sounds like the name of a nerdy emo band. The Bloggers of Stardust. Black ink runs from their slashed wrists as they type out their angst into a coded swirling dark torrent of despair. Yeah, that sounds about right!), I have learned of the formation of possibly the greatest new unit in H!P. Why, you ask, does Usa-chan love this unit so much? She’ll tell you, and in the third person to boot!

1. Usa-chan’s favorite-ish Eggy-poo is currently Saho Akari, who also happens to be portraying the uber cool Amulet Spade character transformation.

2. Usa-chan loves Fukuda Kanon

3. Usa-chan just so happens to adore the character designs for Amu’s character transformations in Shugo Chara.

3.14159. Usa-chan doesn’t usually talk in the third person like this…

3.5. She finds it mildly thrilling.

4. She’ll stop now.

I can’t tell you how happy this new unit has made me.

It’s very interesting that Maeda Yuuka was chosen to be the Amulet Heart transformation, Amu’s main character transformation in the anime/manga. Could that denote an advanced position within the group? I don’t know if I’d like that, as any over-saturated girl in H!P generally annoys me (hey thar Reina). But the fact that my two darlings within the group are portraying my two favorite Character Transformations (Saho Akari as the ever cool MIki, and Fukuda Kanon as the lovely Su) makes me squee like the fangirl that I… well, am. As long as they both get even one tiny little line, the entire rest of the song can be all Maeda, and I’ll be okay. I’m not so stoked about Wada Ayaka, because she’s always reminded me of a brownie. Both the food (which is a dry little chocolate-ish square that grandmothers force into you), and the creatures (which are helpful little sprites that, inexplicably, refuse gifts, especially clothing. Maybe they’re Jehovah’s Witness.)

This good news came at the perfect time for me. Rather than go into detail, I’ll simply say that my life is not going greatly at the moment (a teenager’s position is powerless, or so I’ve been told). Despite all this personal suckishness, just the smallest, most pixelated image of a bunch of cute underage girls dressed up in what looks like cheap cosplay brings all sorts of good feelings back (no, not those kinds of feelings, you perverts). For a half hour, I can sit here and be distracted from any personal crap as I plan out how best to jump a plane to Japan, hide in some bushes, kidnap Saho-chan, put her in my pocket, and bring her back to America with me.

Basically? Idols are the only thing that never fail to make me happy. People come and go, but there will ALWAYS be another poorly produced, talentless pop group out there for me to adore. I give the T-man a lot of grief, but really, I’m very grateful to him.

Thanks, Tsunku. I appreciate it.*

*But you’re seriously still creepy.


Happy 15!

August 4, 2008

So, ever since learned that Yurina and i share a birthday, I’ve wanted to have a birthday party with her! But strangely enough, she never returned my invitations. It seems that she was plotting something behind the scenes…

One morning, Usa-chan woke up bright and early to a feeling of excitement! It was her 15th birthday, August the 3rd, 2008! She sprang out of bed, ready to devour her cake and open her presents.

However, a certain member of Berryz Koubou had different ideas…

“Ha ha ha!” the songstress laughed. “I have stolen all but one slice of your cake! Now what shall you do?”

Needless to say, Usa-chan was quite horriffied at the actions taken by her #2 member of Berryz, and quickly sent her back off to Japan, but not before giving her birthday wishes and withdrawing hostilities.

However, she’s still guarding that last slice of cake carefully…

Happy birthday, Yurina!